Macchars don’t wear sweaters

What strategic management really is

Posted on: January 21, 2010

You’re a publicly listed company, with heaps of money.  You have to spend the money somewhere, but you’re not sure where. You also need to tell everyone you’re doing something.

So, you hire a consultation company for 2 crores, and ask them to give you some recommendations about what you should do.  Now, a consultancy is a company like yours, which let alone tell you what to do, barely knows what it itself should do.

So it delegates the task to a fresh MBA intern, hoping he might know better since hes fresh out of MBA.

Now the intern couldn’t make head or tail of strategic management in college (he incidentally goes on to write a book on strategic management after many years), and had hoped to learn on-job, and is put in a corner. Afraid of losing his job, and also not wanting to do any harm, he decides the best thing to do is to tell the company to do nothing (or recommend harmless changes which dont really make a difference like changing a slogan from “ghuma ki piyo” to “daba ke piyo”). So the intern creates a one page word document asking the company to do nothing, but since he cant say it directly, he makes it sound nice using words he learnt in strategic management, and breaks it up into multiple bullet points.

The consultancy hands you this one page word document in a year.

Aap bhi khush, shareholders bhi kush, intern bhi khush, consultancy bhi khush.  Ho gayi strategic management.

Advertisements

3 Responses to "What strategic management really is"

Balle balle ho gai!

ha ha. nicely put.

a little more is involved but i think conultants are expected to be conservative and mainly called to push through the obvious because of political terrotorial stand-offs.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: